Silenced & Shut-Out For My Blackness

I drink more wine than is recommended by my doctor.

I curse.

I love a good party; and will dance all night.

I, in my late 40s will wear a sexy dress and a bikini without shame.

I frequently don’t return personal texts and phone calls within a decent amount of time (and, sometimes, not at all).

Besides that, I’m a fairly tame, respectful, law-abiding person. In fact, many would say that I have some serious nerd-tendencies.

But I still got put in jail.

Facebook put me there. They made me feel as if I am a criminal, a person whom needs to be shut down and shut out. I, the Randi B. Facebook page, have been suspended and jailed repeatedly and regularly (at some point every other week). The first time it happened, I cried and combed the Randi B. FB page to see what rules I possibly could’ve broken.

There are 70,000 members of the Randi B. Facebook family and we get many additional visitors, so I initially thought that someone could have said something inappropriate. Also, when Facebook suspends you, they don’t tell you why they are suspending you, they just send you a note that says that you may have violated one of their policies so your page is being suspended. They say that you can appeal the suspension but how do you defend a crime of which you’ve been accused when you don’t know what the said crime is? There is no real recourse because Facebook doesn’t have a customer service number that you can call and speak.

I took the shut-down personally. Randi B. is personal. Randi B. is me. Besides getting married and having kids, Randi B. is the biggest gesture I’ve made purely for love. I love Black people; and I became frustrated that the positive news in our community was rarely covered in the news; that the negative news in our community was always the lead story; and most importantly, that I and others felt muzzled because if we voiced our love for our race or concern about how we were being treated we were Kaepernicked (silenced, attacked, criminalized, ostracized, and halted from professional growth). So, I created Randi B., a safe space where Black folks could receive news that was important to us and talk about it without judgement. The site as all about Black love, Black history, Black pride, Black unity. Sadly, when Black folks speak of love – others hear hate.

I no longer will be controlled by other people’s fear; by being misunderstood. I no longer will be censored. I no longer want to feel wrong or bad. I no longer want to feel wrong for fully embracing and loving my Blackness. And I don’t want any of that for Black people. I can’t fix Facebook – but I can rebel against it.

So I’ve started as a beachhead in my rebellion. As a homebase for me – for us – to fight this fight and to let our voices be heard – privately -just us – without being judged or shut down.

Come join me. You are all welcome – and there is strength in numbers.

Our voice. One place. It’s time to have a conversation. Welcome to The Lounge by Randi B.

Sista who believes that we can fix it if we won’t face it. Real talk. It’s time to have a conversation. Blog: